I Ain't Birthin No Babies
by SessandInubros
Summary: So Sasuke thinks he's ready to restore his fallen clan. Well wait till he deals with pregnant Sakura. This will most definitely be fun. Do Sasuke and Sakura have what it takes to parent the newest Uchiha heir to be the best of the best? Lets just pray by the end of this fanfic Sakura didn't kill Sasuke. Sequel to The End to a Resolution and the Start of a New Beginning.
1. I'm Sorry, You're What!

I Ain't Birthin No Babies by SessandInubros

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A/N: So hey guys I'm back which is legen- wait for it...dary! Anywho, it's been awhile and have definitely been wanting to write again but I've been so busy getting lost down the path of life (lame Kakashi excuse I know sue me haha blah blah blah). I'm so excited to inform you that this fanfic is all about Sasuke and Sakura having a little Uchiha baby and their little epic journey to see if they survived (mainly Sasuke cause well any pregnant woman is scary. I've seen them *shudders*). So without further ado, lets go! :D

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Disclaimer: So yea Naruto is property of Masashi Kishimoto and well yea the only thing I own are all the next generation Naruto kiddies and what not.

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"Sakura, all we need is one push and you're little one will be here."

"It's not that tough Sakura just push the damn kid out already. You already crushed my pride and almost every single bone in my body. What more is there to-"

"I'M SORRY YOU POOR THING WANT ME TO KISS IT ALL BETTER?! Oh wait, I can't cause I'M PUSHING OUR BABY THE SIZE OF A FUCKING WATERMELON IN MY UTERUS OUT OF MY VAG! THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT YOU DAMN UCHIHA! I SWEAR I'M NEVER HAVING ANYMORE OF YOUR OFFSPRING AND AS SOON AS THIS SPAWN IS OUT OF ME I'M GONNA CASTRATE YOU TO YOUR COFFIN!"

(A/N: I'm sorry but I'm dying of laughter at this hahahaha! I just didn't want that stereotypical preggo lady going into labor speech I figured Sakura would be a lot more vulgar, meaner, and frankly a lot scarier and of course Sasuke had to open his big mouth lolz anywho we won't know this whole dialogue till the time comes mwuhahahaha :D)

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Oops! Skipped a little too far ahead didn't we? Here's where our story begins. First of all, a congrats is in order for Sasuke and Sakura and their little of bundle of joy on the way. It marks the rebirth of a lost clan and also the start of a newer and better journey: Parenthood. When Sakura first found out she was pregnant it was definitely a shock to say the least. Yes, she agreed to marry the lone Uchiha and she did want a family, just didn't expect it all to happen so soon.

Flashback

The pink haired medic stared wide eyed at the stick held in her hands as the result showed a pink plus sign.

"Well forehead it could be a lot worse," her blonde friend patted her on the back affectionately.

"Yea I guess you're right Ino-Pig," Sakura sighed in relief.

"Besides you're having Sasuke Uchiha's baby and man will that kid be fucking gorgeous," Ino squealed and started jumping up and down, "This village needs another little baby Auntie Ino can cuddle, smother, and dress up! This is so great and is the news of the century!"

"Geez Ino will you cool it," Tenten replied, "She's happy yea but I bet she's scared out of her mind on how to even tell Sasuke."

"Well now that you mentioned I bet she is," Ino rebuttled ignorantly.

"It's alright Sakura-chan," Hinata smiled, "I'm sure Sasuke-san will be happy about it in his own little way."

"Yea and no one could've reacted worse about any pregnancy than Gaara did with Kisa," Temari smirked.

Kisa glared as she shifted the sleeping child in her arms, "You try being a Jinchuriki and having your tailed beast-"

"Yea yea whatever you say sis," Temari giggled as Kisa lightly punched her in the shoulder.

"Guys hello focus on the issue at hand: me," Sakura sighed frustratingly, "What am I gonna do? How in the world am I even gonna tell him," she felt her eyes water as she buried her face in her hands.

"Oh Sakura-chan," Hinata hugged her friend, "It'll all work out."

"Besides Sasuke has wanted to restore the Uchiha clan since it was...well destroyed," Ino reassured her.

"He got his revenge and killed his brother, gained power, and pretty much saved the world from nonexistence. He has no other life goals to achieve now except stay here with you and raise your future family," Tenten smiled, "Cause if he did leave well then my weapon's would take care of him," she grinned evilly.

"Yea cool it crazy weapon lady," Temari teased.

"I understand why you feel this way," Kisa replied, "It's not easy sure but this is just your hormones talking and trying to psych you out. Besides you've got all the support you need with you right here, you're a strong medical nin, and an amazing woman who any man would be glad to have baring his children and you're child will be so happy to have you as their mother. Being a mother is the greatest gift in the world and even though I didn't plan for Sinosuke he's a blessing and I can never take it back no matter how unprepared I was. Trust me you and Sasuke will be great parents. You can do this Sakura."

"Oh thank you Kisa," Sakura cried happily and hugged her, "You're such a great friend! How the heck do you even get this and know how to make it all better?"

"Well um...," Kisa replied hesitantly and looked down at her child.

"Man pregnancy has made you ditzier than usual forehead," Ino giggled as the rest of the girls followed.

"SHUT UP PIG!"

Thus this conversation brought her back home in front of Naruto surprisingly as well as the mighty, newly expecting father: Sasuke Uchiha.

"Remember how you asked me to help revive your clan?"

"Yea what about it?"

"Well there's a little Uchiha on the way...Sasuke-kun I'm pregnant."

That was the last thing Sasuke remembered before his body fell onto the floor and his world turned black.

"Oh no Sasuke-kun!"

"Holy shit you made the Teme faint Sakura-chan! This is the best day ever!"

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A/N: Yep that's right guys...TO BE CONTINUED! DUN DUN DUN! Sorry guys but it's just such a great yet god awful, horribly typical place to stop until the next chapter. Oh man it's just like the regular Naruto manga chapters that are updated haha. God now I feel so cruel and ashamed...

Masashi Kishimoto: BOO! *throws a bunch of tomatoes at me*

What the hell?! Why are you complaining?! You freaking do this every damn Naruto chapter I get so pissed and then have to wait until the next Wednesday...THE NEXT WEDNESDAY! Ugh! *sighs frustratingly* Anywho, I'll make sure to update this ASAP but yea enjoy reading some more fanfic's and...

Masashi Kishimoto: Quick fellow fan fictioners! Don't let her get away! THIS IS SPARTA! *chases after me along with fellow fan fictioners*

OH SHIT! Well hopefully all you fellow fan fiction people's chasing me are really nice and review, favorite, and subscribe a lot so I can update more quickly this week and-DEAR GOD IS THAT A FUCKING BLOW TORCH?! Well until next time gotta go before...oh yea quick little side note Kisa is the OC character I created that is married to Gaara and they have a cute little son. Will be writing that fanfic as soon as I can and I don't wanna blast off again!


	2. Oh well this is Aca-Awkward

I Ain't Birthin No Babies by SessandInubros

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A/N: Hey guys! Oh my gosh I'm so excited and have had an extremely good few days so far! Especially reading the new Naruto chapter! I don't want to spoil it all but you gotta read. Seriously. Just do it. All your questions will be answered and there will be a lot of happy people like me frolicking in fields and meadows and falalalalalalalalala! Anywho, I decided to update another chapter so yay to that and also to the favoriting, subscribing, and reviewing for me and this story! I mean seriously thank you so much guys it means so much and is the reason why I love to write cause of all of you amazing fantabulous people! Hopefully you guys like this chapter and how it turns out and no worries I'm not gonna end this chapter at the worst possible time like I did with the first one, I mean that's just cruel. Enjoy the story! :D

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Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto because I wasn't cool enough to come up with this epically, amazing series and all the characters like Masashi Kishimoto did and yea yea you get the drift. :P

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"Hello! Glad to see you all still here and in tact! An extra bonus! Really: the fact that you've survived Sakura-chan right now is highly impressive considering that she's been possessed by oh I don't know...SUPERNATURAL FORCES FROM THEIR FUTURE DEMON UCHIHA CHILD AHHHHHHH! Haha oh man, I crack myself up sometimes! Seriously though, give yourselves a congratulatory pat on the back for living through the Uchiha Baby Apocalypse. I mean it. It's a really big deal."

"Naruto Oji-san please tell me you didn't drink that milk in the fridge from earlier because it's expired and I think it's making you act even weirder than normal and who in the world are you talking to anyway? You and me are the only people here."

"So it may seem but I know taijutsu, Naruto smirked and suddenly a group of his shadow clones popped out from behind the bushes. Katsumi stared blankly at the clones running towards her and sighed as she quickly took out all the clones.

Naruto's eyes widened and jaw dropped in shock, "Aw man Katsumi! You freaking ruined it!"

"Naruto Oji-san," she started, "That was so lame that there was nothing to ruin."

Naruto glared and mumbled under his breath, "Oh you're definitely his kid alright. Anywho, this is the story about Sakura-chan and Sasuke Teme's journey to becoming parents." Starting from when he fainted after Sakura-chan told him," he laughed.

"I think it'll be a lot funnier when it happens to you Naruto Oji-san," Katsumi smirked.

"UH...YEA ON WITH THE STORY!"

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Sasuke awoke from his slumber, "What happened," he asked while taking in his surroundings.

"Well in case you haven't noticed Teme this is your house," Naruto slowly spoke each word, "And you took a little nappy-poo on this thing called a couch. You're married to Sakura-chan and now you guys are going to have a bab..."

"Shut up dobe," Sasuke hushed while staring off with a dazed look on his face, "Sakura is...we're going to be...clan...revived..."

"Oh Sasuke-kun thank god you're awake," Sakura quickly ran into the living room and hugged him while crying into his shirt, "I'm so so sorry! Are you okay? Are you hurt," she continued crying and rambling on.

"Sakura."

"How is your head feeling? Do you need me to get you anything?"

Sakura."

"I should probably get you something like some ice or some medicine to reduce some of the pain. Yea that sounds good. I'll go..."

"Sakura!" The room filled with silence.

"Is it true," Sasuke asked quietly while looking down, "Are you really...?" She nodded.

Everyone remained silent. Sasuke was dead still while looking lost in thought.

"After all this time," he paused, "My clan is going to be revived."

Sakura smiled, "Yep," but suddenly gasped as Sasuke pulled her into his arms. He held her close to him and stayed in this position for a long time.

"I'm going to be a father. Sakura," he paused while gazing deeply and lovingly in her eyes as he whispered loud enough for only them to hear, "Thank you for everything."

Sakura's eyes started to water, "Oh Sasuke-kun," tears fell down her face and she sniffled while nuzzling her face into his clothed chest.

His lips tugged slightly upward into a smile while running his fingers softly and repeatedly through her hair, "I love you."

"Aa," he looked down at her and grabbed her chin tilting it upward so he could see her face and started wiping some of her tears away with his thumb. They remained lost in their little moment until Sasuke started feeling uncomfortable to show more emotion due to the fact Naruto was still there. He glanced over to Naruto who just looked to be staring off into space.

"Naruto," Sasuke alerted his attention while Naruto, slightly startled, looked towards him.

"Yea what is it?"

"Get out."

"What," Naruto yelled in shock, "Why?! I'm doing anything!"

"You existing is enough," Sasuke replied, "Besides I'm not letting your dobeness affect any part of my child's development."

"I'll show you future development when my fist meets your face," he marched over to Sasuke while popping his knuckles before he attempted to throw a punch at Sasuke's face until Sakura sighed and grabbed Naruto by the ear, flipped him over, and slammed him into the ground so that his face would impact the floor.

"Sakura-chan that fucking hurt, Naruto whined.

"Serves you right moron," she yelled, "Trying to throw a punch at him like that. What the hell are you thinking?! You're really asking for a death wish from both of us, especially me," she glared.

Naruto crossed his arms and pouted, "You guys are no fun! I'll just go wait for Hinata-chan since she loves me. Besides, I gotta make sure no dumb guys try and hit on her cause she's my woman!"

Sasuke sighed, "You know how much of a loser you sounded like just then?"

Naruto glared, "You're just jealous that you're not as cool as me.

"As if that day will ever come," Sasuke scoffed.

"NARUTO FOR THE LOVE OF GOD WILL YOU JUST GET OUT ALREADY," Sakura yelled while grabbing a vase near by and attempted throwing it at him but Naruto dodged it as he hid behind a wall close to the entrance.

He peeked his head out from the corner, "Geez what crawled up your butt?! Fine I'll get out of your hair, till tomorrow that is. My lady is back anyway and I don't want to keep her waiting too long for her chariot," Naruto winked as Sasuke proceeded to facepalm himself and shake his head back and forth while Naruto started to make his way towards the Uchiha compound exit.

Sakura laughed and waved, "See ya tomorrow! Oh and tell Hinata we say hi!"

Naruto waved back, "Will do," he left walking down the streets of Konoha.

"A new start for the Uchiha's huh," he thought, "We'll see how smoothly this goes," he chuckled as he stopped at the village gates.

Back with Sasuke and Sakura

"Finally I thought he'd never leave," Sasuke sighed in relief and winced as Sakura punched his shoulder roughly.

"Be nice," she scolded.

"How do you plan to make me do that Sa-ku-ra," he growled huskily while she blushed lightly as she saw him smirk and walk towards her. He grabbed her by the waist and captured his lips with hers. Sakura moaned as she melted into the kiss and wrapped her arms around his neck while her fingers her gently pulling the ends of his hair. He continued kissing her roughly as he picked her bridal style and carried her upstairs to their bedroom and laid her on the bed while he climbed on top of her. Sakura pulled away and turned over and lied opposite side of the bed and smiled sadly.

Sasuke looked at confusingly and sighed as he placed soft kisses on her neck, "What's wrong?"

"Sasuke you...act like you don't really want this baby," her eyes started to water.

Sasuke quickly flipped her around so she was facing him and stared at her intensely, "Why would you assume such ridiculous thing like that?"

"I don't know," she looked down, "You just don't seem..."

"I'm still in shock Sakura...that this is happening to someone like me," he interrupted, "I mean, after all the horrible things I've done to everyone, including you...there's a part of me that feels like I don't deserve it," he looked down angrily as his body started to shake and he clenched his fist, "But I am glad. Glad we're having this child together, he placed his hand on her stomach and kept it there, "I'm staying right here Sakura and making sure that nothing like before happens again starting with...this child."

She smiled as she snuggled into him and laid her head on his chest and yawned tiredly, "Thank you. I love you Sasuke-kun and I love you too little baby Uchiha," she grinned happily before closing her eyes and letting sleep take over.

"Aa," he sighed as he wrapped his arms her and fell asleep for the first time in a long time with no nightmares plaguing his mind and his lips etched into a smile dreaming happily of his future child.

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A/N: Well like I said another update so I kept my word yay! Anywho, I should be able to start updating more soon at the end of the month/beginning of next month considering I'll be on summer vacation from school and not have any schoolwork destroying my brain woot! *runs around frolicking in random fields singing to the sounds of music until Toph comes and starts earth bending random shit and destroys a kart*

Cabbage Guy: Oh no! MY CABBAGE'S!

*waves some of the fallen cabbages in the air and throws them up highly* THE HILLS ARE ALIVEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Toph: *steals melons from a random vendor kart and throws one at Sokka*

Sokka: WATCH IT TOPH!

Toph: I am not Toph, I am melon lord! Mwuhahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! *continues laughing maniacally and earth bends Aang who's here for some strange reason, causing him to fly up in the air screaming and then crashes back into the ground*

Haha rock beats airbender. Oh man I crack myself up sometimes. :P

Sokka: Uh you know that was my line right?

Yea yea go preach to the choir.

Slade: How come I never get to sing?!

Naruto: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!

Cyborg: BOO YA!

King Leonidas: THIS. IS. SPARTA.

Psy: Gangnam Style!

Hey I fucking love this song! *all start doing the gangnam style dance*

Well...yea so that's actually going on. Dance party with Toph, Sokka, Slade, Cyborg, Psy, King Leonidas, and Naruto! Be jellified of our awesomeness aw yea! Oh yea, please review, favorite, subscribe, and whatever the hell else I would greatly appreciate it and am excited to develop this fanfic more and more! But please tell me cause I'm curious: what do you think the gender of the child will be? Hopefully your not like me when my sister was pregnant with both my nephew's and each time I thought it would be a girl. Of course they turned out to be boys probably cause I made it way too freaking easy and the universe just loves proving me wrong, but hey on the bright side, at least I have another chance this time since she's having another baby! So yea thanks again for all the love and I can't wait to keep writing more! :)


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